Pentecost+9/Proper 13A (Matthew 14:13-21)

Jesus is always driven by compassion. His only motivation for whatever he does is compassion for others. A 20th century saint and martyr, Dietrich Bonhoeffer described Jesus as the “man for others.” I would like us to seriously reflect on how Jesus was able to give himself for others to the point of death. This sacrificial compassion of Jesus is countercultural, considering how much our society puts so much emphasis on self-care. This 33 years old man completely committed himself to the mission of God. How was he able to do that? One can only give one’s entire self to someone when one’s self or ego no longer gets in the way. From a mystical perspective, Jesus’ entire being was embraced in the Triune God to the point he totally lost himself in his union with the Godhead. When this complete oneness with God takes place, one’s ego no longer is an obstacle but becomes a means to love others as oneself. There’s no concern for self-preservation. 

In today’s gospel lesson, we see Jesus being filled with compassion. He teaches the crowd that even follows to a deserted place and cures the sick. His disciples are also there. They do their duty to be realistic and to keep Jesus on track. It’s getting late and these people must go back to their villages and feed themselves. I bet the disciples also want to start moving back to the town and eat something. Jesus probably knows the intention of the disciples which serves two purposes. One is for the crowd, and the other for themselves. It’s like “Let’s wrap it up, Jesus. It’s late. We’re hungry. The crowd must be hungry too.” Jesus doesn’t back off. He goes right back at them. “You give them something to eat.” If you ponder on his saying, it’s quite absurd for him to say that. The disciples never attract the crowd. It’s always Jesus who draws all these people, even to a deserted place. He should be the one who should give them something to eat. 

But in saying so, Jesus turns the disciples’ focus on the crowd. When the disciples are about to lose the sight of their true mission, Jesus gets them back on why they do what they do. They are not only to liberate people from oppression but also to feed them. The disciples don’t back down. They say, “We’ve only got the five loaves and the two fish.” I always find it interesting that they actually count how many they have. This to me sounds like they’re pretty frustrated with Jesus and might be passive-aggressive. “This is exactly how many we have, and you want us to do what?” Despite little they have, Jesus doesn’t seem to mind and says, “Bring them to me.” Then we see his sacred action with which we’re very familiar. “He took the five loaves and the two fish, he looked up to heaven, and blessed and broke the loaves, and gave them to the disciples, and the disciples gave them to the crowds.” Our Eucharistic action is based on this sacred action of Jesus. 

There are at least two things we can take away from today’s gospel lesson. One is where to find the source of compassion. In his entire ministry, Jesus’ compassion always comes from his union with God where he becomes empty of his ego and becomes filled with God. The other take-away is that our Eucharistic action which must be driven by this compassion serves those in need. Our Eucharistic life must reflect on the feeding miracle of Jesus. This is one of the main reasons why our food pantry ministry is so crucial to the mission of Saint Agnes Church. It is the most visible and biblical symbol of the Eucharist we partake every Sunday (though we haven’t been able to since mid-March!). 

It seems our world isn’t getting any better. Coronavirus is still out of control. Our nation suffers and bleeds from the original sin of racism. People are losing their jobs and health benefits. We have every reason not to be compassionate to others. But here we are, still feeding our neighbors, praying for them, checking in with one another in creative ways, and caring for one another. We might not have enough compassion to feed the five thousand but as long as we have it and bring it to our God. God will do the work. All we gotta do is to look around us and see who is in need. The church might not make a noticeable impact on social changes but we do it locally and secretly as the kingdom of God like a small mustard seed is hidden yet becomes a tree, so that the birds of the air come and make nests in its branches. Amen.