Lent 5B (John 12:20-33)

How would you describe the resurrection to someone who has no Christian background? According to Jesus’ teaching this morning, the resurrection is not a complicated metaphysical concept that at times requires one to believe in supernatural phenomena and tends to be abstract if not absurd. Jesus’ language in general is poetic and filled with symbols, images, and analogies. It’s not scientifically informational. It is to inspire, motivate, and ultimately change people’s perspectives and the way to live their lives. It calls for a radical conversion of who to become and how to live skillfully. So, what is the resurrection? Is it supposed to be ineffable because human language fails to describe God’s mystery? 

Well, Jesus doesn’t seem to think so in today’s gospel. The resurrection for him is essentially about how to be fruitful. The image of a grain of wheat falling into the earth, dying, and bearing much fruit shows what the resurrection is like. The resurrection directs one to the way to live our lives fruitfully to the fullest. Too simple to say that the resurrection is the grain of wheat that bears fruit? It certainly is, but simple doesn’t mean easy. (If we’re somehow resistant to Jesus’ simple yet uneasy description of the resurrection, then we want to ask ourselves what it is supposed to be like or how we’ve been told what it should be. We may want to unpack what others have told us what the resurrection should be like and differentiate it from Jesus’ symbol of the grain.)

Let’s step back for a second and ask ourselves a fundamental question about life in general. What kind of life do we want to live? Deep down, we want a meaningful life that matters. I think it’s hard to deny that each one of us would like to live a “fruitful” life. For this reason, the resurrection is crucial to us Christians since it leads us to live fruitfully. Now, let’s reframe this theme of the resurrection in the context of Jesus’ good news which is the inner presence of God. There’s always consistency in Jesus’ teaching. How does the resurrection relate to the inner presence of God? 

The resurrection and God's inner presence are inseparable; they represent two sides of the same coin. The moment we become aware of God’s presence within our hearts, the process of the resurrection takes place. In God’s presence, we no longer remain as who we used to be. The breath we take in and out is perceived as the breath of God sustaining our lives. We become aware of God’s breath in our own breathing in and out. This natural physiological activity of inhaling and exhaling is transformed into that of God’s breathing into the mind and body. How we used to make sense of our breathing dies and resurrects as the Spirit works through and sustains us. 

In our encounter with God’s presence through solitude and quietude, we learn to “observe and watch” how we make of ourselves or are by default programmed to create our own images with narratives that are influenced by the external voices of others. Once we create that gap in ourselves between who we used to be and who we can become, the resurrection process begins. We can say no to our past self-images that lock us in. We start taking on new self-images rather skillfully. We take up the roles that are truly free in God’s presence. We can act selflessly, lovingly, and gracefully towards others and ourselves. The resurrection leads one to self-denial, not for the sake of self-hatred or for someone else in the name of sacrifice but for oneself that seeks ultimate freedom which eventually transforms oneself. This resurrection process sets us free and thus always fruitful. 

But again, the resurrection cannot happen without placing ourselves in the presence of God. We say God transforms us. This sentence is a sentence of mere words that do not mean much at all if it doesn’t come out of our personal experience of God’s inner presence. As long as we are in the presence of God, we do not need to be concerned with the resurrection because the moment we are present in God’s presence in our hearts, we are being reformed, transformed, and informed of who we can become skillfully and how we act skillfully. If I may use Jesus’ use of the grain symbol, we fall into the presence of God, die, and bear much fruit. 

Here’s a practical tip for this resurrection process to happen in our everyday lives. It’s mandatory that we take time to sit quietly to still the mind and body and comprehend what’s going on in the mind and body. In other words, this is to be in the presence of God and let God’s light shed light on the mind. Let the breath of God blow away all the dust off the mind so that we see its states and conditions. We want to see thoughts and feelings popping up and wandering around. The more we sit in solitude and quietude, the clearer we see the mind’s working. 

Outside this stilling prayer, watch out for those moments where we feel like defending or justifying ourselves from someone or situations. Keep alert when we say to ourselves, “I don’t deserve this. I did this for you. Why do I have to…” When “me” and “mine” show up, step back and notice in which narratives we’re describing our self-images. Change that narrative and ask, “What would be the skillful way of being me? What response would be most beneficial and wise that will give me long-term happiness?” This spiritual practice that is situated in our daily routine is how we center our lives on the presence of God rather than locking God’s presence in that 10-minute meditation or prayer time.