The desert in the Christian tradition symbolizes the place where one faces one’s shadow. One thing that we should keep in mind is that Jesus was led by the Holy Spirit into the desert after his baptism. Let’s remember the glorious depiction of his baptism. As he was baptized in the Jordan river heaven was opened, the Holy Spirit descending like a dove and alighting on him while the voice from heaven said, “This is my Son, the Beloved with whom I am well pleased.” This message also reminds us of the transfiguration of Jesus in which the voice from heaven proclaimed the same about Jesus. The same Spirit led Jesus into the desert.
One thing that this guidance of the Spirit into the desert is that the Spirit is the Spirit of the truth that always leads us to face the reality as it is. In the desert, Jesus faces his own shadows. He encounters what is in the deepest depth of his being. We might think that there’s another creature suddenly showing up to Jesus and tempting him to forsake God. We can imagine an angel and a devil trying to convince Jesus to do one or the other. This, however, is not what happened. What took place is that Jesus was honestly facing his shadows that were also parts of him. If we think of the term “demon,” the prefix de- or da- originally means “divide,” “cut,” or “split.” Encountering one’s own demon is facing one’s dark shadow filled with selfish and egocentric desires. Often, we are so attached to these desires that we don’t even recognize they’re our shadows. In a way, being able to face and look at our shadows with courage and honesty is a healthy sign of one’s spiritual life. The very fact that one is able to see one’s own shadows is that one is now detached enough to see that shadow. After Jesus baptism, the Holy Spirit sheds light on his heart. He is able to see what’s hidden in his heart. Biblical scholars comment that Jesus’s three temptations represent our human desire to three powers: economic, spiritual, and political. Which actually does make sense. Don’t we all have this desire to make lots of money or at least have enough not to have to worry about it for the rest of our lives? Even for Jesus, perhaps more. He doesn’t come from a wealthy family. He knows what it’s like to be hungry and poor. Out of all three temptations, this desire to be an economic alchemist must’ve been the hardest. What about spiritual or religious power and authority that can influence people? Don’t we have this desire to have a supernatural power? Imagine yourself being able to prophesy, heal the sick, or be immune to diseases and accidents. You can surely jump off from the top of the Empire State Building and not get hurt at all. It’s like having an immortal life. Who doesn’t want this kind of superpower? Lastly, what about this political power? Every human being is political since politics is about how to deal with your life and its surroundings such as society you belong to. In our everyday language, we may find ourselves using the term church politics and so on. Don’t we have this desire to have a charismatic political power that everyone just listens to you and agrees with you? Think about having this power to restructure all the social problems we are encountering and remove all the corrupted politicians and government officials. I think it’s crucial that we are able to resonate with the temptations that Jesus is facing in the desert. They’re not just his temptations. They’re ours too. We might be inclined to one or the other. Some might have a stronger desire for wealth. Others might be more inclined to religious power or political power. What matters is to see our own shadows. To do so, there are two steps to take. First, honestly ask yourself what your deepest desires are for yourself and others. What is that you really want from you and others? You might have certain expectations for yourself and certain self-images you would like to become. You might have certain expectations for others, such as what you would like others to do for you, and certain images you would like to see in others. It’s fine to have all these expectations and images you create. How can you not as a human being? But the problem is when you have no idea what they are and the worst problem is when you don’t even know that you have them and that you’re so attached to them. Jesus himself knows what expectations and images he has for himself. He knows he has this desire to become an economic alchemist who can turn stones into loaves of bread. He knows he has this religious and spiritual desire to show off how holy he is. He knows he has this desire to be politically influential with good intentions for others. Yet, he also knows that these are all but his shadows as long as he is not set free from those desires, as long as he is attached to these shadows. As he looks directly at his own shadows, shadows are just shadows. They do not consume him. They do not become him. He is not dominated by his own shadows. The light of the Holy Spirit sheds upon him that all his desires, even if they are good intentions for his neighbors, disappear. There’s no more shadow because the light of the Holy Spirit is directly overhead like there’s no shadow at noon when the sun is directly overhead. What are your shadows? Do you recognize what they are? Where are you spiritually? Can you see if you’re consumed by your own shadows or not? During this Lenten season, see what your shadows are. What are you so attached to? Is it a certain self-image you want to become? Is it your expectation of others that you would like them to become who you want them to be? Is it a certain kind of situation that you would like it to be? See for yourself your own desires. Accept what they are since they are a part of you. They are shadows. Shadows exist as long as you exist. But let us not forget that when the light of the Holy Spirit is directly above you like the son being directly overhead, your shadows are no longer there. How do we remain in this place of the light of God directly overhead? You find that light within. No more thoughts or images or feelings to be attached to. Just you and God alone. Go deeper in yourself. Gaze upon yourself in God as well as God in you. Jesus shows us two things. One is to model for us to face our own shadows. The other is to show us to throw our shadows into the living flame of love, God. His words take us to the place where we can see God in ourselves, where no desires or attachments exist,. “One does not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God.” “Do not put the Lord your God to the test.” “Worship the Lord your God, and serve only him.” In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. AMEN. |
Paul"...life up your love to that cloud [of unknowing]...let God draw your love up to that cloud...through the help of his grace, to forget every other thing." Archives
January 2025
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