What do you desire? Desires motivate us to act. For example, we desire to be happy. This desire for happiness moves us to do anything that would bring us happiness. If we find happiness in family, we will invest our time and resources in family life. If happiness is believed to be found in career success, then being a workaholic is never an issue of self-care but a gift.
In the parable of Jesus this morning, we see how the tenants’ desire develops. Initially, they desire to take the entire profits from the landowner. This desire to not share what’s not theirs comes first before hurting and killing the landowner’s messengers. They kill to possess all the profits from the land. Their desire changes when the heir shows up to collect the profits. In their eyes, the heir represents the inheritance that he will receive from the landowner. This covetous desire makes their thinking process far removed from reality. Killing the heir doesn’t make them an heir but senseless murderers. There’s a line in Friedrich Nietzsche’s Beyond Good and Evil that captures the essence of the parable this morning: “Ultimately, it is the desire, not the desired, that we love.” An object of desire changes when something better appears. The desire itself continues to remain in the driving seat of the mind. Yet, it is a part of our human nature that helps us sustain. survive, and thrive in life when guided wisely. It’s not something we must or can get rid of. It’s more like a wild horse that needs to be trained first. If not, it can be quite dangerous. One might try to ride on it and fall badly. Without training what to desire and assessing whether what’s desire is wise or not, it’s toxic and harmful to oneself and others as we see in the parable of the tenants. Unskillful desire leads them to destruction and becomes a cause of suffering. There’s no need to condemn desire itself. While unquenching thirst or craving creates unsatisfactory results, it can be used for good. All we need is to know “what” to desire. But how do we evaluate what we desire is something worthwhile to pursue? Quite simple. Just ask, “Is what’s desired beneficial to me? If so, is it harmful to others?” In the case of the tenants, what they desire is financially beneficial to them but it is harmful to the landowner, his messengers, the heir, and themselves for the consequences of their misdirected desire. We can make a value judgment on their choice of desire that it is not good. It’s not to be desired. Where do we then direct our desire in life? What would be a skillful desire that is beneficial and not harmful? What in Jesus’ eyes would be the intrinsic desire, that which is desired for its own sake? It would be the desire that sets us free from constant craving and clinging. It’s a kind of desire that stops us from desiring. The ultimate desire for genuine happiness is that which puts an end to desire itself. It wouldn’t negate other desires but fulfill them all to the point where all these desires become relative so that any desire that falls on it would be broken to pieces. (Matthew 21:44) They become instrumental desires that are desired to achieve the intrinsic desire. (e.g. desiring to see a doctor is an instrumental desire since it purports to fulfill one’s intrinsic desire to be healthy.) Once our eyes are set on the ultimate desire, we become free from other desires. Jesus’ main concern and interest in his ministry is the kingdom of God. It is neither a place to go after death nor a sociopolitical utopia on earth. It’s a symbol, a metaphorical description of God’s inner presence transforming who we become. It’s an embodied process of who we are in that we not only change the way we think and feel by observing them arising and disappearing but also act wisely and skillfully. This desire, this longing for the Presence deep in us transfigures all the desires we had to gain happiness. We become less detached from the desire to control. Let go and let the Presence set us free from a countless number of desires we have been producing and consuming. Only from this encounter with the Presence, we can produce the fruits of the kingdom of God. It’s my desire for us all to grow the ultimate desire for the Presence. May the Presence grow within us, transfigure who we become and what we do, and transcend what we desire and what the world desires. Today's gospel lesson is about the change of heart. The chief priests and the elders are unwilling to change their hearts as Jesus directs. As he teaches with authority that they themselves do not have, the hearts of his listeners are deeply moved. This doesn’t mean that all those who hear him change their minds by default. Jesus' parable of the two sons illustrates this point. The first son initially refuses to listen to his father but eventually changes his mind and goes to work in the vineyard. The chief priests and the elders, on the other hand, represent the second son.
What, then, does Jesus want his followers to change? The change he invites everyone into is not a superficial change, such as having a positive attitude about life. It is a radical change that impacts the whole person, turning one’s life upside down. Jesus' call to the change of the heart is to turn inward and look deeper inside ourselves that God dwells in us. It is a call to change the way we see God, ourselves, and the world. How we see God in us is not through our physical eyes but through the eye of the heart. We close our eyes to see God. The term “contemplate” originates from the Latin contemplatus. It has meanings such as to “gaze attentively” or to “mark out a space for observation.” In contemplation, we gaze attentively to the busy work of the mind and thus mark out a space for God’s presence. We don’t in a literal sense see God. There’s nothing abstract or theoretical about this journey into the presence of God. We first begin with Jesus’ good news that the kingdom of God is within us. Until we actually experience God’s presence in the depth of our being, it’s a hypothesis that we have to test it out. This process of going deeper into ourselves to gaze at God is through stillness. John Main whose contemplation method our Wednesday group follows makes this stillness into two: the stillness of the body and the stillness of the mind. The stillness of the body begins with having one’s back straight whereas the stillness of the mind is to repeat simple words as an anchor to ground one back to the place of stillness. As we keep ourselves silent, we see that the mind is not silent. We experience how the mind wanders around, creating a series of thoughts and feelings (or simply distractions) that tempt us to break that noisy silence and open our eyes. As a way to gather the mind together around one object (or peaceful distraction), we can use our breath or simple word(s). This is to concentrate our mind. It’s like we attentively look at waves to settle down. We don’t want to rush without patience. Otherwise, we’ll be drawn into the water as Peter once did. (Matthew 14:22-34) But it’s okay. That’s when our breath or anchor word(s) will help us out like the reaching hand of Jesus to Peter. The key is to not give up but relax and rest as though you’re floating on the water, if not walking on it. When we realize our wandering thoughts and feelings come and go, we get to focus more on our breath or anchor words. That’s usually when we feel peaceful and calm. That’s also when we care less about our thoughts and feelings which form a sense of who we are. This self-forgetfulness is linked to the discovery of God’s presence in us. The mind is filled with a sense of self in that God’s presence is not merely hidden but forgotten. The peace we experience in meditation through letting go of thoughts, feelings, and a sense of “me, mine” or the I-making process in our Christian tradition is the peace of Christ that “...passes all understanding” and “guards our hearts and our minds.” (Philippians 4:7) In this peace, there’s a death of self, which is symbolized by baptism. “Therefore we have been buried with him by baptism into death, so that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, so we too might walk in the newness of life. For if we have been united with him in a death like his, we will certainly be united with him in a resurrection like his.” (Romans 6:4-5) This invitation of Jesus to the change of the heart is life-fulling and freedom-giving. Yet, why do the religious authorities such as the chief priests and the elders in the lesson resist it wholeheartedly? A short answer would be their envy. A long answer would be that they’re so full of themselves that they choose not to allow God’s presence to be active in their lives. Jesus’ call to the inner presence of God is both “from heaven” and “of human origin” (Matthew 21:25) since we of human origin encounter the presence of God from heaven within ourselves. The change of the heart happens when heaven and earth are integrated into oneself. Friends in Christ, I would like us to go and work together in the vineyard today. You might say no but as long as you “just do it” that’s all that matters. It’s never too late, and in the presence of God who is, but neither was nor will be, always present, every day is “today.” |
Paul"...life up your love to that cloud [of unknowing]...let God draw your love up to that cloud...through the help of his grace, to forget every other thing." Archives
January 2025
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